The blog

I recently re-watched a childhood favorite movie: Surf’s Up.

It’s basically an animated film about penguins who surf. The main character, Cody Maverick, grew up in Antarctica and always wanted to compete in the “Big Z Memorial Surf Competition” located on a bright, sunny beach. He finally got a chance to compete, but he wiped out on his first ride. His mind was focused only on winning and making a name for himself.

The moral of the story is that life is not about being the best and out-competing everyone but rather having fun. Big Z takes Cody under his wing to train him, but he doesn’t let him start actually surfing until he loosened up and started having fun.

I’ve always been a highly competitive person. I made sure I had the best grades, was the best pianist, the best this or that…I thrived off of being on top.

But unhealthy competition sucks the life out of everything. I remember being so burnt out my junior year with school, piano, soccer, and flying that my dad almost made me quit. He said, “If you’re not having fun, there’s no point in doing it.”

I found a journal entry I wrote spring of my junior year (2022). It says “From now on, whatever I’m going to do to, I’m going to have fun.”

Moving to a big college town and attending a massive university has taught me a lot about competition. I am now 1 in 50,000 students. This was initially overwhelming (and humbling), but it’s also incredibly relieving. I am surrounded by so many people that are smarter and more talented than me. Even if I fail, the world is still going to keep on functioning. The sun doesn’t rise or set according to how much I outshine others.

It’s a beautiful thing – I get to have this wonderful little pocket of the world, and some might never even know about it. I get to be a part of God’s magnificent plan. I am a unique and meaningful contribution, but I don’t have to bear the weight of being the whole. It’s a joyous feeling.

I digress.

My favorite character in the Surf’s Up movie is Chicken Joe. He is the only chicken who is competing with the penguin surfers. Jon Heder (actor who played Napoleon Dynamite) voices Chicken Joe. Imagine the most west coast, laid-back, absolute dude of all dudes. Now put that persona into a surfing chicken. There you go.

He’s one of the best surfers in the game, but he doesn’t even know what he’s doing, where his board is, what day it is…he just knows life is going to work out. He’s relaxed, carefree, totally trusting that he’s going to be okay. He just has fun. He’s in it for the ride (literally).

After watching this movie last week I thought to myself “I want to be Chicken Joe.”

I want to be carefree, in it for the ride, and so relaxed and trusting of God’s plan in my life. I want the things that don’t go as planned or don’t go my way to just roll off my shoulders, knowing that life is working for me, not at me.

If my room isn’t completely put together, I panic. I can’t fall asleep with jewelry on. I can’t stray from my morning and nightly routine without feeling like the world is going to end. I can’t let go of relationships or habits without feeling insecure. I’m not really okay on my own two feet yet.

In middle school, I went on my church’s annual youth-group summer camp. Will Doss prayed over each of the youth members and got a word from God to give to us. He wrote each word down on an index card and handed them out on the last night of camp. My word was relinquish.

Obviously, 12 year old me was pissed off. Relinquish? Are you kidding me? You think I’m some psycho control freak? (I definitively was and arguably still am). I just couldn’t believe this. Everyone got words like joy and peace and faith. I was told to stop being a little micromanager.

I quickly did away with the notecard and made sure I would never see it again. A few years later when I was 16, I stumbled upon the forsaken notecard while rummaging through an old keepsake box. When I rediscovered it, I began to see what the word actually meant.

God wasn’t overly concerned with my obsessive need to lead every group project and parent both of my brothers and tell people that actually, I know a better way to do this. No, He wanted me to relinquish the control over my life and fully surrender it to Him. He waned me to let go of the need to control every situation simply for the sake of maintaining my comfortability.

Remember, peace and comfort are not the same.

I haven’t felt like myself in a while. The transition to college has thrown me for a massive reality loophole, and I’ve just been a little lost. I’ve been unsure of who I am and where God is calling me. There have been things in my life that I don’t know how to properly handle, but I’ve been too scared to let them go. I found myself overlooking my needs so much so that I couldn’t even hear the Spirit speak to me. I lost touch with my inner Chicken Joe.

I think God wants all His children to be Chicken Joe. He wants us to trust Him fully, to let the situations and people we cannot control become His masterpiece and not our project. He wants us to have fun. He wants us to walk in the Spirit, but how can we do that if we can’t even hear the Spirit?

I’m finally getting why God gave me the word relinquish. I now see what He meant when He said last month that I have not fully given myself to Him. I have been governed by the mind and not the Spirit. Fear of the unknown was my navigator rather than peace and growth.

Sometimes you have to let go of that habit.

Perhaps you need to let go of that relationship, even for just a little while.

Maybe you need to make that big career or degree shift, even though it’s scary.

As the cheesy saying goes, you have to let go and let God.

You’re allowed to believe that the world is going to be just fine even if you don’t make the best grades, attend the most prestigious school, and wow everyone you meet. You’re allowed to leave your room a mess and fall asleep with your jewelry on. You’re allowed to prioritize your needs and just have fun. You’re allowed to be content with your tiny little pocket of the world.

May you relinquish the things that are not serving you. May you take the time to listen to the Spirit, to YOUR inner voice, and may you courageously care for your needs. May you sacrifice your comfort for the beautiful reward of growth. May peace be your navigator rather than fear. May you learn to live like Chicken Joe.

May you learn to love yourself and your life again.

¹⁰ He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;
    I will be exalted among the nations,
    I will be exalted in the earth.”

Psalm 46:10 NIV